Lonely in the '60s: How That Era Speaks to Me

Radio: On

The soundtrack plays a major part in this. Even before watching those shows, my playlists are filled with music from the past. Lou Reed and his Velvet Underground, Joy Division, The Smiths, and every musician from that era just get my earworm dancing. The meme of a girl wishing to live in the 90s perfectly summed up what I’m feeling. I never really resonated with the '90s, so I never understood their yearning. But now I do! 

There’s something that screams loneliness and a void within oneself whenever I watch those shows, especially from the female characters. Maybe it’s coming from the nuclear family facade, the old traditional life of a patriarchal family. When meals are neatly prepped, every corners are spotless clean, and the green grass is always cut. But at the same time, the women lived only in the kitchen, the men in the office, the marriage was rotting inside, and society pressured each other to secretly get their own therapist. Everyone suffered under the facade of patriarchy. Even the feminist movement just started around that year! I mean, it’s such a dumb statement to romanticize the ‘60s-’70s era of the United States. But hey, the loneliness that comes from living within the societal pressure never leaves! Loneliness is nothing but a constant resonance. 

Going Analog

It might also be coming from the pace of life, where everything is not digital yet, and every seconds are not yet bombarded by millions of pieces of information streaming into our minds. They lived rather more slowly, manually, intentionally. Yes, with more subliminal advertisements surrounding them. But at least they still read, they didn’t doom scroll; they got out of the house, not bed rotting. Radios listened, newspapers read, televisions watched, letters written and typed. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming of a slower life with analog media, right?

Living Dandy

Loafers, suits, briefcase, oh how I love everyone looking all polished. For the alternatives, too, they look like their closets are full of fun. They would wear typical, trendy pieces, without individual choice and taste. But hey, they looked like their lives were put together! It’s easy on the eyes when men dress like they mean it. Coming from today’s free will, where most men mostly dress as if they couldn’t afford clothes. I’d rather have my men in suits and ties the whole day. Again, it’s a facade for the void, and I love it! And also, maybe it’s coming from the fact that I dreamed of a traditional type of masculinity. Despite my mysandry perspective on men. After all, nothing changes! Most of them are still evil, degrading, and disrespectful, cheaters, liars, but at least they look a lot more presentable than they did back then. If they’re innately evil, why not as well make it fashionable, right? Think of Lucifer, Don Draper, The Godfather, Peaky Blinders. Those are all charming devils, literally and metaphorically.

Modern Utopia

Economy, politics, science, education, everything changes. What’s constant is only change. So, of course, every era has its own pros and cons. To me, those shows, with limited narrations and set lives, serve as a distant utopia. They could live more slowly because the industry and work environment allowed them to. They could live dandy because fast fashion was not there yet. They were able to provide for a whole family, be a trophy wife, or get their dream job, because the ladder career was real. They could be happy because they were representing the privileged ones, the men, the management, the rich, the whites. 

It would not be a utopia if I watched other shows with POC as the main character, or from the perspectives of the women who lived in those eras. Those shows are supposed to show adversity, as a reenactment of the lives lived by the most privileged people in the USA, framed in romanticized versions. And here’s me, a POC from Indonesia, working-class cishet gal who’s struggling to provide for myself in this fucked-up economy. And ironically, I’m still within a small percentage of privileged Indonesians with bachelor's and master's degrees who don’t live as a sandwich generation, living free, far from home in Jakarta. Of course, ironically, those shows would still look like a dream to me, and I’d keep watching with all these privileges.